Faceless Enlightened

You find it in you then.
The bravery to do it.
Finally.
You hug the grenade,
tight to your chest.
Pull the pin, and count.
3,2,1...
and you are,
free?

Only awareness.
A severed soul.
Hovering there above it all,
just as they promised.

And you watch it there,
on the floor and walls.
The bloody carnage that is
your feelings and thought.

Love sprayed as blood,
despair but broken bones.

Organs and severed limbs,
as memories,
scattered there,
but no longer yours.

"You will be free!" they said,
And for a moment you smile.

But then you see it,
that the smile too,
is no longer yours.
Just a reflection,
of something there,
in that bloody mess.

You are not content,
Not free.
Not more,
and not less.
Just nothing.
Simply,
nothing.

Enlightenment,
was but the flash?
Everything now,
is silence.

---

And if you could,
you would wonder then,
if you can patch it all up again.
Go back to being you.
Free from knowing.
But awareness can't mend anything.